Dad’s Bad Mood Can Seriously Affect Children’s Development, Study Finds

“Whoever does not have a good father should procure one.” ~Friedrich Nietzsche

Hundreds of studies have solidified the fact that a father’s love is just as important to a child’s development as a mother’s, and sometimes more so…

Research has proven emphatically that, overall, the love — or rejection — of mothers and fathers affects kids’ behavior, self-esteem, emotional stability, and mental health. According to Ronald P. Rohner, Ph.D., director of the Center for the Study of Parental Acceptance and Rejection at the University of Connecticut, in some cases, the withdrawal of a father’s love, acceptance and presence seems to play a bigger role in their children’s’ problems with personality and psychological adjustment, delinquency, and substance abuse. And of course the transverse is also true. The presence of a father’s love boosts children’s sense of well-being and improves their emotional and physical health. …But this is common knowledge. Most people are aware and do recognize the impacts a father has on his children.

Dad’s mental state directly affects his children

Scholars from Michigan State University (MSU) conducted a study and their findings not only underscore the importance of a father’s role in the lives of his children, but it went on to to prove that dad’s overall mental state and moods have short and long term, direct effects on his children.

In the study, MSU researchers collected data from about 730 families that participated in a survey of Early Head Start programs at sites across the nation. The researchers focused their attention on discovering effects of parents’ stress and mental health problems such as depression and anxiety on their children. They found that parents stress levels and mental health issues affected how they interact with their children and, subsequently, their child’s development.

One of the most surprising findings derived from this study is that a father’s mental health has long-lasting implications that directly correlate to differences in children’s social skills (such as self-control and cooperation) by the time children reached fifth grade. In fact, a father’s depression during the toddler years is more influential on the development of a child’s social skills later in life, than are a mother’s depression or anxiety.

The study also highlighted the fact that a father’s parenting-related stress levels have a particularly harmful effect on his children’s cognitive and language development when the children are 2 to 3 years old—even in the presence of a mother’s’ positive influences.  As might be expected, the father’s’ influence appears to have a stronger effect on boys’ language than girls’ language.

These empirical, evidence-based findings are a poignant reminder that every father has a responsibility to take care of his own psychological well-being in order to nurture and foster the well-being of his children.

One uplifting and positive thing that comes from this study is that we now have solid, scientific proof that dads do play as significant a role in raising children as mothers do, and that their piece of the family puzzle is crucial in helping a child learn and grow properly.

Changing dad’s mood

Parenting is a daunting and stressful undertaking–no two ways about it. Especially for new parents. Below are some ways for dad to minimize the negative impacts his foul mood can have on his kids:

• Accept the fact that you will feel stressed — Understanding and accepting that stress is a part of child rearing is key to helping reduce its impact on your mood. If you expect it and prepare for it–you can proactively minimize it’s effects on your mood and it can reduce the number of outwardly negative reactions you display.
• Learn your triggers and work to de-stress as quickly as possible— Learning and becoming in tune with yourself is one of the best things you can do for yourself.  Find out what situations, thoughts or moments cause you the most stress. Can they be avoided? What can you do to avoid or minimize these moments? Take some “dad time” and engage in activities that lower your stress levels–engage in a sport or hobby, take quiet time away, take a walk on the beach or engage in forest bathing.
• Get help — If you are feeling overwhelmed or have a history of depression, anxiety or mental illness be sure to seek professional help. It is imperative for you and for your children. Consider the “airplane safety model.’ During the flight attendant’s safety speech, you are instructed to put your own oxygen mask on first and then help those around you don theirs. The message here is that you can’t help others breathe if you are suffocating.

BY DENISE HILL

http://www.lifehack.org/448563/dads-bad-mood-can-seriously-affect-childrens-development-study-finds

The Powerful Effect Of Meditation On Children

When I was in second grade, my desk was in the corner of the room facing the “penguin wall.” We called it my “office.”

I was a little ball of energy and in school I didn’t know what to do with myself as I tried to sit still and focus when all I wanted to do was play with all my friends around. I thrived in activities that allowed me to express myself but was a constant distraction to everyone around me when it came time to focus on things.

I would get frustrated when I didn’t know how to do certain things like math or word problems because I wasn’t able to maintain focus long enough to get to the answer.

My teachers recommended that I be put on medication to help control my behavior, but my mom wasn’t having it. These problems continued all the time I was in school and I eventually had to learn to work around them.

It took me learning to quiet my mind and slow my thoughts down so that I could focus and stop getting frustrated and overwhelmed.

Many kids suffer from these kinds of “problems” because they don’t learn how to cope with them while they’re young and have to figure it out the hard way like I did. Our children are growing up in a world completely unlike the one that raised our generations, and the effects of that world are becoming more and more apparent in the sometimes unmanageable behavior that is starting to take over among young children.

Meditation is a technique used by many for all kinds of reasons and can be very effective for kids as young as two or three.

Start with just a few minutes a day, add it to the morning or nightly rituals, (or both!) do a guided meditation with them.

Start by creating a tranquil, quiet place away from distractions like the TV, games or other family members. sit together on the ground and begin by humming together to establish your inner connection and your kids connection to the tone of your voice. Slowly turn the humming rhythms into breathing exercises.

Fill your chest with air all the way up to the chin and then slowly empty the breath all the way through the tummy.

Help them to focus inward — the best way is to get them to learn to be more conscious of the feeling of their own bodies. Talk calmly and quietly about a happy, serene scene that relaxes them.

Help them visualize a scene that represents peace and calm in their minds. Ask them to describe it to you to help develop the visual in their heads further. Use musical ambiance if the sounds seem to help keep their attention better.

Then, after the guided meditation, let them sit in complete silence, with their own mental images and feelings.

Meditation, like anything, takes time and practice. Consistent attempts at meditation with your kids can make a world of difference for them at school, in sports, social situations, and can help you get them to bed quicker and easier.

Having something like this in your daily routine will help each person in your family reconnect with each other as well as the energy inside of them.

It is important to have exercises like this to balance out the intense instant gratification of technology and convenience that our society offers. We can all benefit from learning to take a moment to collect ourselves, focus on our breath and decide on an intention so that we can better accomplish both short-term, and long-term goals.

Click here to discover your free demo of OmHarmonics, our bestselling course that fuses binaural beats with meditation, to help elevate your consciousness.

This post was originally published on the OmHarmonics blog.

http://www.finerminds.com/mind-power/power-meditation-children