Showing posts with label manipulation. Show all posts
Showing posts with label manipulation. Show all posts

Sunday, 31 July 2016

5 Simple Phrases People Use To Manipulate You

People who have mastered the art of manipulation are some of the most elaborate story weavers, "misdirecter's", evasive, and annoying people in the entire world.
They know just what to say, how to say it, who to say it too, and what to do with them afterwards all in order to get what they want. These people have little to no concern for people's feelings or their lives all together.
You are but a minor inconvenience for the thing that they want most out of you.
Just so you know what to look for when it comes to dealing with a manipulative person, you should be aware of these common misdirection's that they give people once they have set their eye's on something they want.

1. "Don't Overreact"

Often times a manipulative person will tell you that you are overreacting to what they want from you. They will try to play it off as if they weren't asking anything from you at all.
Most of the time they will overreact themselves if you continue to deny them whatever it is they are looking for. Do not give in, you are not overreacting, they simply want to see you cave in to their needs.

2. "Don't Be Dramatic"

Following up with saying not to overreact, they will tell you to not be dramatic at them. Unfortunately, this scenario is already dramatic with them prying whatever information they can from you.
It is important that you see them as being the dramatic ones and do not pander to their little manipulative games.

3. "Don't Be So Sensitive"

Just by saying this, this person is already demonstrating that they do not care for your feelings for the situation. Regardless of whatever it is they are asking and you are not comfortable with it, you do not have to explain to them why you feel the way you do.
You do not have to entertain someone who isn't going to care whether you help them or not. Your feelings are more than valid and if they say not to help this person, then you shouldn't indulge.

4. "Don't Be Crazy"

If this person truly has the audacity to call you crazy or say don't be crazy after you say no to them, then you will want to address this immediately. Do not give into their games no matter what they try to tell you or how you're acting.
If you being "crazy" is a rational response to their wants or needs, then there is probably a good reason why you're feeling that way. You are not crazy, you are thinking clearly more than ever. If anyone should be claimed crazy it is them.

5. "Don't Misunderstand Me"

Often times the manipulator will resort to saying this final sentence of "do not misunderstand my intentions." Unfortunately, there is no other way to interpret the things that they want from you.
They have already misunderstood you when it comes to your wants and needs by harassing you for something for their own personal gain.
You have not misunderstood anything at all. You do not owe this person a single thing. Not even the time that you are spending with them at this present moment.
If you are living a life with a person who often manipulates you or others, you may have to address this toxic behavior and then remove yourself from their presence entirely.
There are no compromises, there is no talking it through, there is no coming to an understanding, and if they really want these things from you that badly, they are going to have to go find it from someone else.

Friday, 12 February 2016

7 Signs Your Partner Is Madly In Love With You

They don't try to manipulate you.
When someone truly loves you, they don't play games and try to manipulate you. If you feel like you're being manipulated, confront them. It's not healthy if you're in a relationship with a manipulator.

They can always cheer you up.

Something about them - they can just always cheer you up even when you're the most down. They know how to push your funny buttons and can always put a smile in your face.

They believe you can do things on your own.

They don't have a sense that your hand must be held through every little task in life. They think you can handle your problems and goals on your own. But still...

They're there when you need them.

If you can't handle something on your own, there's no harm in that at all. They're there for you any time that you need them. They love you and all they want is for you to succeed.

They keep you grounded.

When your partner loves you, they won't let you get to full of yourself. They'll keep you grounded some. They won't let your head get too big.

They may not understand but they'll try to learn.

Every human is wired to be empathic. We are able to understand another's experience as if it were our own. Still, some things you have to experience to truly understand. Even if they don't understand, a partner who loves you will try.

They're your best friend.

Who wouldn't want to be?

Tuesday, 7 April 2015

How to Become a Spiritual Badass – The 20 Laws of Spiritual Power

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So you want to become a spiritual badass?

By following these laws you will learn to be a spiritual badass, to be both perceived as spiritually powerful and, more importantly, feel the depth of your own latent spiritual power.

This is a play on Robert Greene’s book called The 48 Laws of Power, a book geared toward sociopaths and narcissists about how to be powerful. It tells you how to be powerful without use of morals, ethics, or care for anyone but yourself. I suggest reading it to understand where these types of people are coming from.

I’d bet it’s required reading for any politician.

Anyways, here are the laws of power that come from a heart-centered place.

1. Be Honest

Many people think they’re being honest when really they’re lying.

The best liars never say any falsehoods, but their intention is to deceive. For example, a man stays late after work having sex with his secretary. His wife asks him if he’s been cheating on him, he replies, “Honey, I was at the office all day.” The words were true, but his intention was to deceive.

A powerful being has no reason to lie, has no reason to exaggerate, has no reason to be deceitful.

Being deceitful comes from a place of un-acceptance of one’s character flaws or mistakes.

Be strong enough to admit when you’re wrong. People who are deceitful aren’t honest because they can’t handle the truth.

2. Have Impeccable Integrity

Weak people make promises they can’t keep. Powerful people do what they say they’re going to do.

Don’t make promises you can’t keep. Or better yet, commit to as little amount of things as possible.

Your word is your bond. Be strong enough to do what you say you’re going to do. Learn how to say no.

3. Use Non-Violent Communication

Raising one’s voice, using snarky tones, yelling, insulting and casting blame are done by weak minds.

Spiritually powerful people do not dump their frustrations on other people. They speak in a calm tone, using phrases like “When you do this, I feel like this” instead of “You make me feel x and y.”

4. Respect People’s Stuff and Space

Treat other people’s stuff and space better than you would treat your own things.

If you borrow something, return it without being asked.
If you stay in someone’s space, leave it cleaner and nicer than how it was before.

Clean your dishes, much drama comes from the kitchen.
Follow this law and people will trust you with their stuff and enjoy having you stay at their house.

5. Respect People’s Freewill

Trying to change people, whether it’s for their good or not, is a form of manipulation.

A weak minded person projects his own flaws in others and tries to change others instead of himself.

The spiritually badass sees the continually expanding perfection of every moment and does not need anything to change, she feels perfectly content as she is. She allows others to go their own way and follow their own path.

6. Abstain from taking intoxicants

Intoxicants are a get-happy-quick scheme. The spiritually powerful do not feel the need to ingest poison which hinders their cognitive abilities, as they are perfectly content being sober.

A glass of wine, a beer, fine. But getting inebriated often leads to poor decision making across the board. Be strong enough to say no.

7. Abstain from Gossip

If someone is gossiping about someone to you, they will likely gossip about you to other people.

Talking bad about someone else is an easy trap to fall into. Speak about people behind they’re back the same way you would speak to them to their face. Use non-positive words like “I’m not the biggest fan,” instead of “I hate him.” Or “he’s not the nicest person” instead of “he’s an asshole.”

A weak mind loves to talk smack. It feels good to put other people down.

But the more spiritual powerful one becomes, the more negative talk and thoughts will bring one down instead of superficially inflate one up.

Spiritually powerful beings are enjoying life so much that they don’t have the time or energy to dwell on the negative aspects of someone else.

8. Have Perfect Posture

Nothing exudes confidence like perfect posture. Strong mind, strong body.

A spiritually powerful person is a master of his body. He is able to comfortably sit up straight whether on the floor or in a chair, likely due to many hours of yoga or sitting meditation.

9. Comfortably Hold Eye Contact

A weak mind is afraid of other people’s eyes. It cannot handle the power of gazing into the window of the soul.

Spiritually badasses want to fully connect with those they are speaking with by looking them in the eye.

10. Don’t Itch

Itching is often a nervous reaction. Pay attention to when people (and yourself) itch when they are talking. It’s often due to some kind of uncomfortable feeling.

Scratching is never a sign of strength. Use the itching sensation as an intense mindfulness practice, to break the habit pattern of the mind by observing sensation without reacting.

11. Become a Master of Language

Spiritually powerful people are mindful of their language. They remove uh’s, um’s, you knows, and unnecessary “likes” from their vocabulary.

They speak non-violently and using stronger, higher vibrational words. Instead of saying “I hate it,” say “I really don’t like it”.

There are no I have to’s, I need to’s or I should’s, there is only I want to or I don’t want to. Not, I have to do laundry, either I want to do laundry or I don’t want to do laundry.

Cut out victim mentality words. Instead of “I’m too busy to do it” say “It’s not a priority.”

12. Your Life’s Purpose Is to Serve Others

What would you do if you had all the money in the world? People’s answer to this question says a lot about their spiritual power.

Would you spend all your time doing selfish activities, or would you spend a good deal of your time helping to make the world a better place?

Spiritual badasses have developed such a great deal of compassion and empathy that one of their biggest sources of joy comes from helping and serving other people without expectation. Through serving in this way, one develops unconditional love.

13. Take Utmost Care of Yourself

To best help others, one must take best care of oneself first.
Don’t mistake getting adequate sleep, exercise, healthy food and doing what one knows is best for oneself to be selfish.
If you can’t take care of yourself, how can you take care of others?

Balance serving others with taking care of yourself, first.

14. Move Your Body

Your body is the vessel which transmits consciousness. Make it as open, clean and clear of a vessel as possible.
Your body wants to move, it was designed to move.
Move it. Every day. Develop body awareness. Feel your power.

15. Eat Healthy, Organic Food

Your body is composed of matter that originated as the food that you put into your body.

Spiritually powerful people use the highest quality fuel possible regardless of its price. They know it increases their spiritual power far beyond any other material things and they therefore make spending on healthy food a top priority.

16. Meditate

The biggest spiritual charlatans claim not needing to sit in meditation because something else is their meditation or they only need to practice mindfulness.

A weak mind will find any excuse not to sit and meditate.
A spiritually powerful person has a consistent meditation practice because she recognizes it is one of the wisest investments of time one can make.

17. Tithe

It can be hard to detach ourselves from money.
Donating 10% of one’s income to a charity one believes in is a powerful exercise in abundance.

Tithe, but don’t tell anyone about it. Donate anonymously. Get the ego out of it.

18. Give Others Credit

A spiritually badass knows he’s a badass and does not need external validity or a myriad of external success to feel good about himself.

Practice showing others how they impacted something or their role in a positive outcome instead of wasting energy trying to remind everyone how awesome you are.

19. Allow What Is to Be

Recognize the inherent perfection in every moment and give no importance to exerting excessive force or struggle to change reality.

This does not mean ignoring all the problems in the world, but learning to act through the non-friction, high energy of inspiration instead of low energy, easily depleted willpower.
One who masters this art will appear to move with grace and ease, because that is what their natural state.

20. Be Transparent

Spiritually powerful people only do things that they are comfortable sharing with the world. Because of this, they have nothing to hide and will tell you anything you want to know.

They are comfortable sharing about their weakness, faults, mistakes, and other “negative” aspects about themselves because they understand it helps us connect as humans, instead of putting up this wall of being a perfect being.

The spiritually powerful understand that importance behind every action is intention. When one’s intentions are good, one benefits by being transparent.

by 
http://www.dumblittleman.com/2015/04/20-laws-spiritual-power-become-spiritual-badass.html