Have you ever traveled abroad and visited historic cities? If you have, you have probably seen some extraordinarily old structures. They may have been wondrous cathedrals, incredible monasteries, simple dwellings or even ancient ruins. What did you think about those buildings that have stood the test of time?
Were they ugly in their slow decay, crumbling walls, and lack of a youthful modernity? Or were they beautiful beyond description, in a way that you can’t really know or relate to what they have seen through time?
What do you think of your parents and grandparents? Are you repulsed by their aging bodies or filled with love because of who they are and what they have represented in your life?
Have you ever had the pleasure of enjoying a bottle of wine from an old, rare and fine vintage?
These are just some extreme examples of the beauty that can be found with age. When we were thinking about this recently, we had an epiphany: from the cracked and crumbling masonry at Machu Picchu high in the Andes to the wrinkles of our wise and loved ancestors, there much to be adored in the process of aging.
This concept runs contrary to what we normally think when we consider the aging of ourselves, or even the perceived lack of physical beauty in ourselves.
The truth is that, in our society, we fear the loss of our youthful beauty. So much of our own self worth is tied up in what we look like because we’ve been taught that our beauty is valuable and should be held onto as long as possible using whatever drastic measures that we can think of and afford.
It is so easy to forget this fact: physical beauty is a construct. The idea of physical beauty changes throughout history as values and morals change, and across different cultures. The truth is that beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
It all starts with the application of makeup when we are young, trying to measure up to what we are shown in the media of what it means to be beautiful our society. Perhaps we weren’t given a strong narrative of self esteem, as the lack thereof is often passed down through generations. Many of us hear our parents talk about the loss of their youth, the pains of aging, and in extreme cases we hear them talk about their own poor body images.
Then as we grow it can manifest in eating disorders, obsessions with working out, and in some cases surgical alterations.
When we consider this, we think of the simple idea that you don’t have to alter your appearance to be beautiful.
This should not be looked at as a judgement. We are not criticizing those who choose to alter their appearance to line up to whatever their concept of beauty might be. In a lot of cases, this is just part of a long road to regaining self-worth that may have been lost somewhere in their upbringing. All we are saying is we believe that it is not necessary.
We sometimes go through stages in life of being critical and judgmental of others. However at some point most of us have chosen a spiritual life and start observing from the heart rather than the mind.
It is then that we understand that what we look like and how that changes as we age does not take away from how others feel about us. Just because we feel as if we are not beautiful, or that we develop some wrinkles as we age, that doesn’t mean that our beauty is diminished in the eyes of those who love us.
Here is a simple affirmation for those times that we are especially self-critical:
http://thespiritscience.net/2015/11/07/beauty-is-a-matter-of-perspective-how-to-love-yourself-unconditionally/“I love myself and am loved. I know in my heart that I am beautiful. I know that life is a process and I will go through different stages of learning and aging, but the core of me will not change. Though I may look different as I get older, my own unique beauty will not lessen.”
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